(WXYZ) — I report on the latest scams every week so that you can stay safe. One type of scam that is particularly devastating is the romance scam, because it not only can impact a person's financial security, but also their emotional well-being.
I spoke with one survivor, who has been helped by a Michigan-based romance scam recovery group.
Watch Alicia's full story in the video player below
Beth Hyland of Portage, Michigan, met a guy on Tinder who claimed he was a freelance project manager for a construction company from Indiana – a job that he said had him traveling from California to Qatar.
"Like we were talking at one point, marriage, you know, like he was going to move here," Hyland said.
Their romance blossomed, mainly over texts and phone calls.
Did you ever have a chance to meet this individual in person?" I asked.
"That actually, that never happened," she said.
But, they were planning a life together, and when he needed money to hire a lawyer and translator in Qatar to facilitate a $10 million payout for a job he claimed he'd completed during the COVID-19 pandemic, she helped him with a $26,000 loan.
When he needed $50,000 more about a month later, her financial advisor told her it was a scam.
"Now thinking back, I'm like, that it sounds so like, wow, that just doesn't make sense. But like at the time, it made all the sense in the world," Hyland said.
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She even wrote a book about it called Diary of a Romance Scam: When Swiping Right Goes Wrong.
Hyland joined a romance scam recovery group through the Michigan-based non-profit FightCybercrime.org.
"The effects of this trauma are truly devastating for people. So, ensuring that they're getting support and resources is important," Dr. Jennifer Lawrence, the program lead for the peer support group, said.
Lawrence said the group has served more than 600 people over the last five years.
"What about being the victim of a romance scam is different from, say, other typical scams?" I asked.
"People have truly bared their souls, their emotions, they've shared such intimate details about themselves. And they truly thought that they had this very intimate relationship with this person. So, you know, not only the financial loss that comes with it, maybe, you know, there's stolen identity, you know, financial issues, but also really just that true sense of grief and loss that comes losing a relationship," Lawrence said.
Hyland found out the scammer created his Tinder profile using social media pictures he'd stolen from a real man in Germany. Getting over that heartbreak took time.
"How helpful was this recovery support group?" I asked.
"It was just great to have so many other victims to relate to," she said. "My heart was still all-in, and I wasn't thinking about the cybersecurity part. So, they were really able to help guide me to ways of protecting myself, keeping myself safe."
Hyland said there's often a stigma associated with romance scams. She wants people to remember that the money is not given or lost to scammers — it's "stolen" by them. And it's important to her that the people targeted in these scams are not referred to as victims, but rather "survivors."
